6 Topics You Must Discuss With Your Partner Before Marriage

The things you will want to discuss before your marriage may vary depending on how long you have known each other. If you’re already living together, there might be topics you have already worked through. However, getting a fresh look on these aspects is important to gauge what similarities and differences you’ll have to deal with. Don’t assume anything beforehand because in reality, your individual expectations may be very distinct.

Here are six topics you must discuss with your partner before marriage:

Finances

Write up a monthly budget for your first month of marriage. Answer the following questions–

• If you both are working, what is the total of your combined incomes?

• If one of you is still going pursuing education, what are the tuition fees and loans that need to be paid?

• What percentage of your income should be saved or spent?

• What are your financial goals?

Work-Life Balance

It is best to know what kind of jobs you will be doing. Will you have unique working hours or will your work hours coincide? You should also discuss how both of you will prioritise together time, alone time, and social time. And if you have differences in this, how you will adjust to each other’s demands is important to ponder upon.

Sex

Sex is an essential part of one’s love life. Be sure to talk about your expectations for frequency and types of sexual preferences. Moreover, you should discuss how you plan to prioritise sex as you get older and life gets busier with careers and children. You should also talk about your expectations for your wedding night and honeymoon. And if there’s a past that you need to communicate about; it is extremely valuable information you both might want to know about each other. Don’t pretend or be vague, be specific about your needs, so that nobody is blind-sided by what comes ahead.

Housekeeping

This is a basic concept, which can be a source of a lot of confusion and conflict. Traditionally, women were supposed to do the household chores while men went to work. But this is changing as more and more women come into the workforce. It is essential to equally distribute the household duties as a result. Make a calendar or a schedule to help chart who will work on which responsibility and which days of the week. Think over these duties of grocery shopping, preparing meals, cleaning up after meals, taking out the trash, laundry, cleaning, and maintaining the house.

Counselling

You both should share how you feel about counselling in general. Do you see it as a healthy maintenance step or last resort? Discuss with each other whether you would be embarrassed to go counselling or whether you have any negative experiences that make you resist it. Be clear about under what circumstances you should seek couple’s counselling and how much you can share your difficulties with friends and family.

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Social life

Having separate social lives along with shared activities is a healthy way to maintain a relationship. How much time can you give to friendships and how you feel about your partner travelling with friends should be out in the open. Moreover, knowing each other’s socialising needs will help you plan ahead.

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