Internalized Patriarchy That We All Engage In Without Realizing

It is a known fact that we live in a patriarchal society. If you aren’t familiar with the word, then let me tell you that it means that we live in a society where men are given more power and control than women. In a patriarchal society, women are considered inferior to men.

Now, many would argue that we have moved on and patriarchy is a thing of the past while a few others would say that it does exist in some parts but we have moved past it. Now, I would urge you to think about it once again and then tell me is it really true?

I agree that the world has changed but we still have a long way to go. Even if we resist the idea of patriarchy, we still follow some of the rules without even realizing it.

You might not agree with me at this point but let me elaborate. The society we live in is so accustomed to the idea that we have normalized the little acts of patriarchy. We still follow them in the modern world and we don’t even know it.

The little Acts Of Patriarchy

Let me give you some examples.

• Even if women are guests at someone else’s place, they are still expected to serve while the men and the boys of the house sit in the drawing room talking about the problems of the nation while they don’t realize that they need to solve the problems at their home first.
• At most homes, men are sitting at the dining table while women are serving them. No matter how hungry the females are, the men of the house eat before them.
• After the meals, men leave their plates on the table and just go back to discuss the problems of the world while the women are picking up their plates.
• Women are often told that you can do whatever once you get married. It is a common thing to say in most households but it is actually very problematic to tell your child that you can’t live your life the way you want unless you have a man with yourself.

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• Apart from this, we see that son-in-law’s are put on a pedestal while daughter-in-laws are not given the respect that they actually deserve.
• Parents unknowingly say that we want to give all the love to our daughter because one day she will go to her own home as she is ‘paraya dhan’. They might say it out of love but it is a really problematic thing to compare a human being with money.
• Girls are often asked to change their clothes and wear something more “appropriate” when guests are arriving. Even though those appropriate clothes are not comfortable, they still have to change.
• Even when the husband and wife both are working, only the wife is expected to take part in household chores while the husband rests as he is too tired after a full day of work.

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Unlearn The Little Acts Of Patriarchy

We have normalized these little acts of patriarchy to the point that we don’t find anything problematic with them and go on to say that we have left patriarchy behind us.

However, there is a need to unlearn these small acts of patriarchy in order to make it a better world for all of us.

For more such stories, stay tuned to HerZindagi!