Expert Suggest Five Tips To Cope Up With Emotions Of Miscarriage

Miscarriages are an unfortunate but somehow common phenomenon that women around the globe face. It occurs due to several medical reasons, among which some of them are beyond an individual’s control. Despite the duration of pregnancy, couples may share many emotions, such as denial, guilt, anger, depression, envy, yearning, sadness, or at times none of them. The important aspect is to focus on healing and dealing with the emotions in the best possible way. Hz spoke to Sheetal Bidkar, a Clinical Psychologist at Suasth Hospital, Mumbai to take an insight into how to cope up with several emotions post-miscarriage.

“Miscarriages are a common occurrence but need to be addressed in the right way. Predisposing factors and common reasons like an abnormality in foetus, lack of feminine hygiene, deficiency, and other medical complications in the mother such as hormonal issues, abnormalities in the uterus, fibroids, cervical incompetence, etc can lead to miscarriages. However, individuals consider and deal with miscarriages as a secretive social stigma that results in vulnerability and suffering,” said Sheetal. She also shared a few pointers that can help to overcome stress and despair.

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Allow Yourself To Grieve

Miscarriages can happen at various stages. But, even if the pregnancy ended early, it is quite natural to still feel a strong bond to the lost baby. Those who undergo a miscarriage, deal with a range of many different emotions, mostly guilt and dejection. While many don't realise their mentalstate, others try to findhow todeal with depressionon social media or random websites. The Clinical Psychologist believes that "the key is not trying to ignore or push your feeling away. It might not help, instead, address your sentiments and emotions."

Remember It’s Not Your Fault

Guilt is a particularly hurtful stage of grief which takes a lot of time to disappear. The problem is that many women assume that they did something wrong or bad to cause their pregnancies to fail. “It is the chromosomal abnormalities that are the most common cause of miscarriages in most cases, and are not preventable,” said Sheetal.

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Talk To Your Partner About Your Feelings

Multiple factors like religious beliefs, relationship issues, and social stigma can make it more difficult to cope up with this situation. Free yourself from stigmas and talk about how you are feeling to your partner. This is not only imperative for you but also for him. “Researchers suggest that there are a significant number of men who experience depression after their partner has gone through a miscarriage. Men find it difficult to express themselves due to the prevailing cultural taboos and try to deal with it in logistical ways,” told Sheetal.

Focus On Healing

In some cases, the loss can trigger mental health problems, such as clinical depression or acute anxiety. While these can be healed with proper guidance, do not ignore getting treated because it can make the existing health problem even worse. Healing is extremely crucial at this stage for both partners.

Consider Taking Professional Help

Consulting an expert (counsellor or psychologist) helps in emotional regulation, stress management, marital harmony, emotional wellbeing, and redesigning the thought process in a positive yet rational way. Suffering in silence cannot be an option. Recovery and healing takes time, as it involves physical and emotional changes. The process requires refocusing, being empathetic, and accepting one another.

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