Are you imagining your arranged marriage like Prem and Poonam? Sooraj Barjatya’s movie ‘Vivah’ starring Shahid Kapoor as Prem and Amrita Rao as Poonam portrayed a concept of an idealistic arranged marriage which no longer exists. However, the arranged marriage setup portrayed in the movie somehow shaped our thought process and we secretly manifest the same. Wait, let me give you a reality check. Currently, the divorce rate in India stands at 1.1% which is the lowest across the world. But, it is increasing. In the past few years, there has been a significant increase in divorce rate making headlines. Though, it’s a subjective thing, navigating red flags before getting into this sacred setting might reduce this rate. If you are planning an arranged marriage here are the red flags you can watch out for.
Mr Ravi Mittal, Founder and CEO of QuackQuack, Spotting red flags in arranged marriage early on saves people from disappointment; it is even more indispensable to watch out for red flags when it involves lifetime commitment.
8 Red Flags You Should Watch Out For In Arranged Marriage
Here are some red flags you should watch out for when meeting prospective partners in an arranged marriage:
Sybil Shiddell, Relationship Manager, Gleeden, India said “While arranged marriages can resemble blind dates arranged by your parents, a lifetime commitment is at stake. They frequently go very well, but it’s important to be on the lookout for any obvious (or covert) warning signs.”
The Resume King/Queen
Let’s agree that the arranged marriage process is more like job interviews. It starts with a biodata but here is a catch. Sybil Shiddell suggests closely observing the biodata. If their biodata appears more like a corporate resume, filled with exaggerated accomplishments and little individuality, step back. Marriage is about the heart, not about achievement hashtags.
Overeager Family Interference
Family involvement in arranged marriages (beautiful marriage quotes)is absolute. But there is a thin line between involvement and interference. In discussions, you may be committing to a marriage with the in-laws rather than the individual if their family speaks more than they do. It’s a big red flag that you should watch out for. Think, are you prepared to experience “them-time” instead of “we-time”?
The Relationship Ghoster
Let’s agree that you can’t know a person entirely in just a few meetings or conversations, but it gives you a gist on whether to move ahead or not. Also, it’s evident that your prospective partner might not reveal everything to you. Sybil Shiddell said that a little mystery is okay, but if they seem secretive or avoid queries about their previous relationships, you may want to look deeper. Being unfaithful during the premarital stage? I’m sorry.
Unrealistic Expectations
Having expectations from your partner is not wrong. But there is a fine line that says it all. Sybil Shiddell asks to be careful of someone seeking a partner who makes like a CEO, looks like a model, and cooks like a MasterChef. You’re not marrying a Swiss Army knife, you’re marrying a human.
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Contradictions Gallery
It is rightly said that actions speaks louder than words and you should never trust a person whose action contradicts their words. This statement perfectly fits in relationships (new age relationship terms). Sybil Shiddell suggests watching out for this trait. If their actions and words contradict each other, step back, because life with such people can be living hell. You’re dealing with a living contradiction if they advocate for equality but demand that you comply with outdated customs.
The Checklist Enthusiast
We are humans, not products that can fit a particular checklist to be sold to customers. If you meet someone who overlooks the fact that you are a human and rather consider you as a product on sale and approach the process of arranged marriage like checking off items on a shopping list, stop and step back.
The Over-perfect Personality
We all have our flaws and there is no shame about it. But the beauty of being a human is to keep improving to become a better version of ourselves. However, if someone appears too perfect, flawless, polished, and smooth, trust me they may have something to conceal. Authenticity is real, yet it’s not perfect. So, don’t fall for those perfect-looking people coming straight out of a fairy tale.
Over-Emphasis On Materialistic Things
Life should be spiritually fulfilling not materially rewarding. But if someone over-emphasises on material things, it’s a big red flag. Ravi Mittal said, that if every conversation with a prospective partner revolves around or boils down to family status, appearance, boasting about finances, and material success, it may signal that connections that go beyond the surface level are not a
priority to that person. Some level of materialism is present in all of us, but too much of it never pans out well.
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Watch out for these red flags when meeting people in an arranged marriage setup to save yourself from future disappointments.
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