Ranbir Kapoor Asks Alia Bhatt To Wipe Off Her Lipstick, Just Another Husband-Wife Trope Or A Subtle Toxicity Passed Down In The Name Of Marital Bliss?

Alia Bhatt likes taking the unusual route when it comes to applying her lipstick and I was intrigued watching her do that for a video feature for Vogue India recently. Just when I was wondering if this kind of lipstick application can turn into a new beauty hack, Bhatt said something unsettling.

The Heart of Stone actor shared how she applies her lipstick and wipes it off as she likes it that way and also because her husband Ranbir Kapoor doesn't like it. She said, "Because one thing my husband…when he wasn't my husband but when he was my boyfriend as well… he would be like ‘wipe that off, wipe that off’ because he loves the natural colour of my lips."

As soon as the video went up on social media, Bhatt's fans flooded the post with comments asking the actor to 'wake up' and understand that she was in a toxic marriage.

This wasn't the first time Alia Bhatt hinted at husband Ranbir Kapoor's misogynistic behaviour. She previously shared how Kapoor doesn't like it when she raises her voice in anger. She said, "I have to try very hard to control my anger because my husband does not like (it) when my voice goes above this decibel. Because he thinks it's not fair and it's important to be kind even when you are unhappy."

Unfortunately, Alia Bhatt embracing the red flags in her relationship is proof of the social conditioning women undergo in India which makes them take no notice of misogyny even when it shines through.

No relationship is perfect but healthy marriages are free of toxicity, a silent yet deadly threat a lot of women in the country fall for even today. These toxic traits have existed for ages now and normalised to the extent that they continue to be passed down in the name of marital bliss and adjustments. Even though a lot of Alia Bhatt’s fans recognised the misogyny and called it out, many married women even today fail to understand it and end up being in a toxic relationship.

Your Partner Controls Your Day-to-day Decisions

Time and again, Bhatt's statements hint at her husband's controlling behaviour. To some, it might sound possessive, and controlling, all thanks to the conditioning that makes us believe that it is okay if your partner tells you how to dress or how to speak or how to wear makeup (no offense some find it cute too) but is it? Giving your partner your power control and then living a life based on their desires is a strong clue that you are in a toxic relationship.

You Are A Pro At Compromising

Girls are schooled to compromise as they grow up. Once married, they are advised to adjust for a happy married life. Eventually, she ends up compromising each day, leaving behind their preferences, welcoming every decision coming from her partner, and changing her priorities to name a few.

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Your Comfort Is Ignored

As women, we are taught to prioritise the comfort and security of others. We are put on a pedestal, labelled the 'comfort givers'. We are expected to be considerate of our partner's feelings, no matter if the care is reciprocated.

Your Shortcomings Are Highlighted In The Name Of Fun

This one is another subtle red flag we women often tend to ignore. No matter what you achieve, be it shedding a few kilos, bagging a new job or getting promoted, if your partner ends up taking a jibe there every single time, look for the insecurity and not the joke!

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You Feel Distanced From Your Loved Ones

'Now that you are married, your marital home is your real home, do what your husband tells you to, he has a complete right over you', every newly married girl in the country is taught to follow this 'mantra' for a happy and successful married life. Following this, even if the partner tries to distance his wife from his family and friends, it is labelled 'normal' but is it?

You Do Everything

The patriarchal attitude doesn't seem to die down even today. 'Man of the house is the bread-winner and he shouldn't do anything except manage the household finances', the mindset hasn't changed even today when a lot of women are bread earners too. Even if a woman earns today, she is expected to head back home and complete all the household chores. Because women are always better at doing that and men only at managing the money.

A good relationship needs to be free of gender roles, and have an equal amount of effort and respect coming from both partners, and anything less shouldn't be trivialised.