From Rent-a-Boyfriend to Kink Events: How India is Embracing Alternative Intimacy

For decades in India, individuals struggling with relationship issues had limited avenues for seeking support. Therapy was primarily for deep-seated mental health concerns, and beyond that, most people relied on friends, family, astrologers, or dating apps for guidance, depending on which socio-economic segments they came from. What TIC brings to the table is a structured, educational, and stigma-free approach that helps individuals understand their own selves, their patterns, behaviours, and desires.

Founder Aili Seghetti explains that their service aimed to fill a gap that dating apps, therapists and matrimonial sites weren’t filling. Aili highlighted that the lack of sex education or literacy around emotions is prevalent among Indians, which is why services provided by the TIC are quite the need of the hour.

“We help people when they aren’t finding matches on apps or aren’t able to hold a conversation. Or maybe they fall in love too often. We also have couples who come to us because they lack physical intimacy between them, or they want to add something exciting to their lives,” she said.

The Intimacy Curator works with couples and individuals through sessions and coaching but also conducts events that are attended by many. Some of their events include Monogamy Disrupted (an event for those exploring polyamory or other alternate lifestyles), and Worship (a kinky play-date event).
We explore how TIC operates and what their observations are of the changing romance and intimacy landscape in India.

Read: I Attended A Sensorial Dating Event. It Was Weird, Wonderful and Oddly Eye-Opening.

This is our series ‘Business of Love’, where we dig deep into businesses carving a niche in the romance and relationship space in India.

What Indians Struggle With In Dating and Intimacy

Aili recalled a recent session with a 30-year-old client who was struggling to understand what “vibes” meant – given it was a frequently encountered term in modern-day dating.

"It's not just some abstract feeling," she explains. Attraction is a complex mix of body language, chemical exchanges, and psychological triggers, which is something she and her team help explain to people.

Another challenge she frequently observes in her practice is how people are looking for everything in one person when seeking a life partner. “You’re looking for a companion, someone who’s compatible, a mentor, and someone who also excites you sexually. People expect all these things from one person, which is something that’s never supposed to happen,” she said.

Unconventional services of theirs that have been successful are Dating Surrogacy & Rent-a-Boyfriend.

In dating surrogacy, the client gets to go on a real-life date with a trained coach who provides constructive feedback on communication, body language, making the first move and flirting. This is especially popular among men looking to improve their dating experiences. “Men have much more to learn because women have evolved, and expectations from men have changed while men have been left behind,” she said.

A similar service called Rent-a-Boyfriend is designed for women who want to experience a date without the risks of emotional entanglement, safety concerns, or unwanted advances.

Increasing Curiosity Around Non-monogamy and Alternate Lifestyles

While older generations largely adhered to structured, monogamous relationships, today’s youth are questioning traditional norms, gender roles, and long-term commitment models.

While TIC has a lot of people in their 30 to 40 approaching them, these age groups still want monogamous marriages, but its the younger folk who are more exposed to these conversations due to their online presence, and the older generations who’ve already had some experience in these matters - that are leaning most towards alternate lifestyles.

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Sensory dating experiences, non-monogamy workshops, and kink exploration events in different cities are part of TIC’s event calendar. In Aili’s experience, while people are increasingly opening up to alternate lifestyles, safety and social judgment remain concerns, especially for women. TIC ensures strict vetting processes and consent-based participation to create a safe and comfortable environment.

Another observation Aili has had is that the monogamy bubble isn’t working. “From client experiences, I would say that 70% will have affairs eventually once they get married,” she said. Many married individuals grapple with infidelity, not necessarily out of malice but due to a lack of communication, emotional fulfillment, or unmet desires. “Communication or way to communicate one's needs and being able to negotiate that, is an area of concern and there needs to be more education around that,” she added.

Growing the Brand

As a business, TIC has witnessed remarkable growth. They now have over 1,200 registered members and over 8,000 newsletter subscribers. They’ve managed to conduct 35 events in two years, with 9,000+ applications wanting to attend the events and over 3000 attending them.

They’ve also expanded the team from a solo operation to 30-40 event professionals and six coaches.